Sunday, October 07, 2007

Monkey Business

I have a love hate relationship with monkeys. We live in the same area as a fairly large troop of monkeys and to be honest, they get on my nerves.

Now I know the "monkey huggers" will tell you that it is our fault that the monkeys are a menace and to an extent I have to agree. There is no denying that we are invading their territory and they were here first. You get idiots who will insist on feeding the monkeys, which causes them to breed more than they otherwise would and it also causes them to lose their fear of humans, which then leads to them feeling welcome to enter our homes. I once turned around from my computer desk to find a large monkey sitting about a metre behind me with my fruit bowl on his lap, having a feast of note!

I love dogs and there is no way you can be a dog-lover and a monkey-lover too. The monkeys torment my dogs something terrible. They run up and down our garden wall and tease the dogs mercilessly. They have been known to kill dogs twice their size, usually by disembowelling them – not nice! I am trying desperately to grow grass along the edge of my wall and it is simply impossible as the dogs race along the wall after the monkeys and churn up all my newly planted grass in a matter of minutes. To irk me even further, the monkeys feel completely comfortable stealing my newly planted cabbage seedlings and helping themselves to the unripened granadillas on my vine, which drives me nuts. But I think the final straw for me was when they ate the newly hatched chicks of the Hadeda Ibis we had been watching for weeks, those poor hadedas were distraught for days afterwards and I could never look at a monkey in the same way again.

monkey








Things changed for a few brief minutes this morning though; I was on my stationary bike (which is kept on the verandah) having my leisurely early morning cycle, when I was treated to an impromptu march past of the monkey equivalent of “The Chippendales”. Where they were going and why it was an all male affair I don’t know, but there they were, resplendent in their technicolour genitalia! Generally they ignore any human beings that happen along their way, but I think they found the spinner fascinating (or maybe I look particularly appealing in the morning?). For some reason, they all lined up in front of me, sat down and settled in for some “people watching”. The dogs hadn’t noticed them, so there was complete silence as they looked at me and I looked at them. The moment was spoilt somewhat by one of them having a huge wee on my wall, but still, it was fun and I think they enjoyed it as much as I did. For a few minutes I actually appreciated the monkeys on my doorstep!

19 comments:

MissMeliss said...

That's fantastic!

Robin said...

Now that's exotic!

I'm going to stop complaining about my pigeon problem now.

Jo said...

A wonderfully colourful post....I felt like I was right there. And after a trip to Indonesia, I'm not very keen on monkeys either.

Jo said...

A wonderfully colourful post....I felt like I was right there. And after a trip to Indonesia, I'm not very keen on monkeys either.

Shelby said...

yes - a wonderful post :)

Just Jen said...

I love it! I would be annoyed to end also. You're a hilarious, down to earth writer. Thanks for leaving a comment on mine so I could see your work! I loved the part that he peed on your wall in that peaceful moment! LOL

Lucy said...

disemboweling them!!!! OH MY, I thought my squirrel troubles were a problem. OH MY again!
As for your description of you "Chippendale monkeys" hahaha I'm still in Stitches Gill, you wrote so well, I imagined strip tease music playing! EXCELLENT read this morning! :))

Liza's Eyeview said...

I like monkeys too but I would be scared to see them inside my house eating my bowl of fruit :)

Herb Urban said...

This post had my cracking up! I like monkeys as much as the next urban dweller, but I would draw a line at having them over for breakfast.

Great post!

Laura said...

*LAUGHING* I'll never be the same again, after being able to imagine a strut line of monkeys! *LAUGHING* Thank you, Gill, for a most enjoyable post this day!

Marie said...

It's amusing to see the different kind of problems there are half way around the world. I would have never imagined having so much trouble with monkeys! Guess you don't want a barrel full. Thanks for visiting me and giving me a view into your world. It was interesting.

UL said...

I am fascinated and curious for more - this was such a great read. And a great laugh, thank you- I wouldnt mind watching any animal from a distance but to have them up, close and personal, no thanks. I can understand your dilemma. :) Thanks for sharing.

Wayfarer Scientista said...

Great post Gill. I remember how obnoxious monkeys could be when I was living in Ghana...they do seem to get into everything and unlike a small child there doesn't seem to be a way to discpline them.

Wayfarer Scientista said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
tumblewords said...

Fascinating fun! Loved your descriptive writing...

KentuckyGal said...

OK, now THAT'S something you'd never see in Kentucky! *LOL*

Redness said...

Ohhh such a brilliant post - them watching you made me crack up ... Thanks Gill!

gautami tripathy said...

I must write about monkeys sometime. I simply love them!

Carrie! :o) said...

Oh my gosh, I'm laughing and in awe all at the same time. Having never been out of America, I can't even picture monkies running around like we have squirrels running around. One with your fruit bowl??? Now that is hilarious ... and them watching you ride, what a hoot! I would have lost it when it pee'd on the wall. You crack me up! I just love reading aout your life!! It's so ..... exotic! :o)

I am busy ruminating on an updated bucket list - it's a lot more difficult than one would think!  The last time I created a bucket...