Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Strange times indeed!

Tonight the family and friends start arriving from far and wide, for the funeral service tomorrow. I can't tell you how much I am dreading all of this...

But in amongst all the angst, there have been a few crazy-funny moments too, you know those moments when you feel a vague sense of hysteria rising and you just have to laugh?

Yesterday the lady from the funeral parlour faxed me a copy of the order of service thingy to look over. When I opened it I found that it had my mom's name in bold letters, with her date of birth and date of death underneath it - my mom was, for some reason, paranoid about people knowing her age. So I phoned the woman and explained that we do not under any circumstances want dates on this thing - this blew her mind altogether...."but we always put the dates on!" she says - I explained that in this particular case we are NOT putting dates. True as nuts she then asked me if it would be okay to still have the dates on the front cover then??? AAaaargh!

We arranged for funeral notices to go in a couple of newspapers - the Mercury and the Natal Witness. This morning they appeared, the Mercury was fine, the Natal Witness had: "Lyn Read, loving wife to Neil, mother to Gill and the late Grant"!!!! It should have read "Gill and Grant and the late Craig"!! So it would appear that I am sleeping with a dead person... .

To top it all, having had the shock of learning that my husband is "late" over my breakfast, I brushed my teeth with the "now-deceased Grant's" toothbrush!! I was in such a daze, I brushed my teeth and then realised I had used Grant's toothbrush head..... EEEuuuuW....

Wish me luck at the service tomorrow people, so not looking forward to that.... I won't be on-line for a couple of days - but will be around again on Monday. Oh flip, my aunt who is at Cape Town airport, waiting for her flight to durban has just phoned to say they have evacuated the airport building!!! I wonder what's up??

14 comments:

allie said...

I guess you know you're going to be ok when you are actually registering the hysterically funny moments in the midst of the trauma, Gill.

Yes, the funeral is a thing to get behind you - but my prayer is that that sense of being carried will remain with you all through this time.

Ann said...

Your mother was not so unusual about wanting to hide her age. I was at the funeral for a friend's mother a few weeks ago, and she had also insisted that no date of birth be evident anywhere.

Take time to share some fond memories and favorite stories with the family.

Terri said...

Sending you warmth and comfort from across the pond. You get to collapse after the service if you need to. I think it's a good sign that you can find some humor amidst the insanity.

Lucy said...

good Luck Gill, so happy you felt up to posting the funny moments. It's so important! I feel the same about my husbands toothbrush! why is that? we can kiss there mouths, isn't it similar? yet, ewww! xoxo hugs to you

Addie said...

LOL at the "late" hubby ...
All the best for everything. I'll be thinking of you!

Tamara said...

All the best for the funeral.

I also get grossed out by the sharing atootchbrussh thing. Icky.

Fifi said...

Thinking of you my friend! This is a hard time and I will be praying for God's grace to be over you and your whole family.

Elinor Dashwood said...

Gill, I'm so sorry to hear the news about your dear Mom's death. I will be thinking and praying for you and the family as you go through these very difficult days!! I'm glad you have found some humor in it too...that's heathy. At my Dad's funeral service 2 months ago, I not only cried, but I laughed...a lot! Life is precious and we need to learn to not only cry, but laugh and smile at the memories made.

Big hugs!!!!
Elinor

angel said...

i hope it went as "well" as a funeral can. i hope your weekend is a peaceful one.

Kitty Cat said...

We're all here for you in Blogland. Hope it goes well.

Trish said...

thinking of you ... good you can keep your sense of humour even at the darkest hours.

Look after your self and Grant !

Caz said...

Hi lady, how's it all gone? Been thinking of you!

Linda said...

Glad you have not lost your sense of humor in these trying times.

Jeanne said...

Oh Gill, the feelings you describe are so familiar! And aren't funeral parlours the pits? They do try to be comforting, but if your family is slightly unconventional in any way, then they can seem positively obstructive. At the one we used for my mom, we had to look through the designs to choose one for the order of service - and they were all loathesome - or at least things my mom would have loathed. In the end I chose the least offensive as the path of least resistance, and the lady (obviously trained to do so) said "that will be lovely". I was on the edge of breaking into total hysteria - not sure whether laughter or tears - to say "no, it's about as far from lovely as it's possible to be!! And the guest of honour would have hated every thing about it. How about we ditch the tea and only serve booze instead?"

Or when my brother and I were doing a read-through of our eulogies an hour before the funeral, sitting in my parents' bedroom with the door closed. I got most of the way through and then just started crying and then could not stop laughing and told my brother I was sure to have a Tourette's outbreak in the middle of the eulogy and start cursing in anger that she was gone! We were both screaming with laughter, and when we eventually opened the door, my sister-in-law was standing outside in a state of panic - she could not tell what the screaming behind the door was about but didn't want to intrude. It was funny and sad and wonderful and painful all at the same time.

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