Monday, October 26, 2009

Disgusting! Really, really disgusting post

As you will know if you've been reading this blog for any length of time, I am a complete naff. I am scared, grossed out or nervous of just about everything. Geckoes included. Living on the South Coast of Kwa-Zulu Natal, geckoes are everywhere and where they aren't their poop is. Horribly disgusting little creatures. They love to creep around the ceilings with their pinky-grey-brown semi see-through bodies, purely to torture me. I'm always scared they're going to plop down on top of me. With good reason, seeing as about 16 or 17 years ago one did.

Picture the scene: It was almost bed-time and Grant had gone into the kitchen to make tea, I was sitting in the lounge, clothed only in my nightie (I know, too much info, but it's relevant to the story, so bear with me), reading a book. Next thing a gecko fell off a picture frame, right down the back of my nightie. Oh my word! For a moment I completely lost my marbles, ripped my nightie off and began to wave it around my head, shrieking and dancing around the middle of the floor. Grant came tearing into the lounge and stood gazing at me open-mouthed. Well wouldn't you? I could just see him thinking "Finally, she wants to play stripper fantasy games - I like it!" It took quite a while for him to get out of me exactly what I was up to, I was completely speechless for at least 5 minutes. So I don't have a great track record with geckoes.

Now that we have cats, I am presented with gecko corpses on a daily basis. To my mind, the only thing worse than a live gecko is a dead gecko or a piece of one. Eeuuuuw! The cats just love to hunt them, they'll go to enormous lengths to stalk them (see below) with an incredibly high success rate.

Pepsi on top of the grandfather clock.

Last night I was sitting in the lounge chatting to my Dad and Grant, unconsciously playing with something with my bare toes, picking it up, rubbing it under my feet (truly I have no idea quite why I was doing this...need to see a shrink!) We'd been sitting there for ages, when we got up to go through to the dining room. As I stood up I suddenly became aware that I had been playing with something with my toes, I bent down to see what it was and there it was, between my toes ......... shudder, shudder, shudder.... I realised that all this time I had been fondling a large, dead gecko with my feet. Total freak out! These great big shudders kept going right through my body - I still get freaked out just thinking about it. EEEEeeeek!

13 comments:

Redness said...

Oh Darling stop being so hard on yourself ... you're normal everyone has a fear of some description. Still hoping things look up for you from here on in ;)

Gillian said...

*giggle* I can imagine you ripping your nightie off and swinging it around. I would also have been a little grossed out.

I'm just as freaked out by mice. Read this post of mine http://gillianhefer.blogspot.com/2008/05/mouse-in-da-house.html

Kirsty said...

Oh Gill - this post made me laugh out loud!!! That is sooo funny! But - eeewww! Playing with a dead gecko!!
I do admit to being quite fond of the critters... at a distance, and only on holidays! Not sure if I could cope with them 24/7 either! x-x

Andrea said...

oh my word Gill, we were separated at birth I tell you....I am absolutely terrified of Geckos and they are the one thing I totally don't miss about KZN - I once sat outside my office for 3 hours until someone rescued me coz I just couldn't make myself walk underneath a HUGE gecko above the door which I was convinced was just waiting to fall on me...pathetic I know, but I would so have had to be committed after your story, am freaking just THINKING about it...breath in breath out

xxx
A

Joanne said...

I dont know if we can be friends? I LOVE geckos, but rats.....

Anonymous said...

LOL this made me laugh!!!! I live on the Bluff and we have alot of geckos too, a few weeks ago I was in my parents bedroom and see a gecko stuck on my dad's back, right in the middle, geez I screamed so loud when I saw it, I dont mind seeing them around, but on my dad's shirt really freaked me out! Thank god it wasnt on my back - I would have had a heart attack, so I totally feel you on this post.

Ordinarylife said...

Sorry, had to laugh. That is something I would do!

Not that I mind gecko, just that I would play with something without looking and then be totally freaked out.

Jeanne said...

Bwahahahahahah - yo had me laughing out loud at my desk there - the vision of you playfully toying with a dead gecko with your feet, Pepsi in stalk mode, the nightie strip maneuver - all of it! Reminds me of the day we came home to find my mom and dad in the laundry courtyard doing what looked like a dance, and with my mom in only her bra waving her jersey around her head. What we had missed was the swarm of bees passing by and one getting into my mom's hair and one into her jersey!!

Tamara said...

You live in Kzn and you've only had one fall on you?! Impressive ;-)

I love geckoes - they eat mosquitoes.

thejacksonfiles said...

bwahahhhaaaa.

awww...i love geckos

natalian said...

I can relate. I've had one drop into my cleavage. If one gets into my bedroom I can't sleep for fear that it will drop on me while I'm sleeping! Well, summer is here and they are about to come out of hibernation - poop and all!

Kirsty said...

where have you been?? Missing you!
You have an award/tag on my blog, so now you HAVE to post something, kay? x

Andrea said...

First let me say I didn't know you were back blogging...secondly let me say that I AM SO GLAD YOU ARE and thirdly, I SO GET THE GECKO PHOBIA, one of the reasons I LOVE living where I do lol.
Off to catch up with the rest of your posts xxx

My favourite cold remedy

I've been knocked flat by a cold this week.  Sore throat, sniffles, stuffy head, temp..... feeling very sorry for myself!  In fact, it&#...